3.0

Sound familiar? Bad dreams can kill ya.

2.27 Birthday party!

Thought I post some pictures from last nights birthday party. Hurray, I'm twenty, and non the wiser!

2.26 Damn!

No mater what James says, I'm not obsessed but I can't help that I think Rick Genest is the most sexy man alive (and no, it's not somethnig i just discovered) Figuring that tumblr might be sick of me posting pictures there I decided to switch platform for a moment, just to be able to repeat the phrase: Damn, dude! Damn..

2.25 Over skyene skinner alltid solen.

I've just read a lot about the formalised way of explaining that I've though I know I should be reading, because my goal is to pass my exam, I doesn't mean I'm going to do so. So, If my exam is about the phenomenon "I know I should. It's for the best, but hell, I won't do it" then I'm going to pass.

Another "phenomenon" that's bothering me now a days is that when when I'm stressed out, my mind has a tendency to think that a good idea would be fuzz even more about it.
Just being anxious about the exams, among other thing, isn't enough. In additon I have to be unable to eat or sleep, thous also study and therefor get more anxious. I can't remember the last time I was this restless and zombielooking. I've lost over ten pounds in the last months, therefor I'm also anxious about looking like a 70 year old shemale. I'm so looking forward to the end of the term. I'm going to spend the christmas break doing nothing but eating, sleeping and working out.

I'm in one of those periods that the more you read, the more you learn, the less you realize you know. I find myself not speaking. In our study circles, I've got nothing to contribute with, not because I haven't read, but because I'm suddenly doubting my ability to understand, reflect, and interpret. I'm doubting that I have depth, or an interessting point of view. Oh my, I though I was a tad bit over the whole existential crisis thing for now. Haha.

I think I need a good slap in the face, someone (other than myself) to scream at me that I'm not cut out to do things perfectly, or just being forced to lay down and calm down.

Luckily I've had some really good days to even out the mist of the Kalmar union, the roman empire, deductive logic, Karl Popper, Gaddamer and hermeneutics.
So in a language you should know: Over skyene skinner alltid solen: Du er for ung til å forstå. Det gjør så vondt å vente på.

As far as studying goes...

I’m pretty much screwd unless I can find a liable connection between Queen Margrete and the warranty on sillicone implants at Fornebuklinikken.

"As far as Queen Margrete is concerned, one can say that her political qualities stood in stark contrast to her lack of knowledge consering fornebuklinikkens five year warranty on prostheses. Furthermore, one can wonder about her harsh policies against the Hanseatic League, came from a heart of stone that was a direct consequence of hard capsules forming in her heart region. Capsules that as she could have removed if she knew about the warranty of Fornebuklinikken’s prostheses
If she wanted to fit better into a male-dominated profession, she could have removed the entire breast region within five years and thus strengthened her position as she would no longer look as much like the weaker sex.
And if you doubt that Margaret had breast implants, one can also wonder to what extent such oprasjon could have helped her in the face of a male council. This out of the proven fact that men, faced with bared breasts, often have an impaired ability to deliberate decisions. This may be the reason we got the Kalmar union."

Is it obv. that I’m not really motivated at all?

2.23.

3 weeks of exams in front of me. Can't focus at all. All the history in the world doesn't matter when when your own seems to be a epic tale of bullshit. My hands are holding the history of europe, but my head is making up it's own.

2.22. Fantepakk?

I've now finished todays 10th cup of coffee and I've just switched to energy drinks. It's only half past one. Today is one of those days I wish I has a tad bit older than 19. A tad bit more confident and a tad bit more intelligent.
I'm writing a paper about gypsies in Norway, that may, or may not, quallify me for the exam in older norwegian history. I'm horrified by the thought of not passing, and the fact that I may have misunderstood everything I'm writing about.It feels like I'm writing a bunch of big words with no meaning. Trying my best to make sense of Heymowskis ridicilous understanding that if you have a nordic name, you are not a gypsy, nor can you be a decsendant from a gypsy. You are probably just a travelling criminal. I guess if my future grandchildern move to Kina and name their childeren Dim and Lin they automatically lose their nordic decsent.
I should stop making fun of my lack of understanding of other peoples . . . serious. . .research and get back to fucking up my paper.

If I do not pass this I'm gonna become a traveller, slaughter horses, and go on welfare myself. Hah, stereotyping is fun.